2003-01-14 - 6:42 a.m.
Could I have loved you anymore? any more?
I don't know.
There's only so much one person can do.
All I know is every single thing I did revolved around you.
You were like a cloud surrounding me.
You made me happy beyond words' capacity to describe. All I could do is try to maintain. Inside I was a bonfire. Now you're gone. But I'm not alone, or rather I should say, I'm not lonely. This love is not borne out of need (though I could so grow to need you), it is not a child of want (though want you I do), it is not the aching cry of a lonely heart... it is energy... a power which was created when your life and my life touched, yes, it is the overflow from that. My every thought and act was perfectly seasoned by thoughts and feelings about you... Sweetened, made spicey, by succulent, savoury you. And I know that if love is meant to be it will be. I know if two are meant to be together in love then not even we can stand in the way of that. I've prayed for this. Waited for this. Felt it so strongly I could taste this. My love for you... the greatest I've ever known. And I have loved greatly. All tolled, these other loves, the summation of which, could not compare to the love I have for you. But there is a hush upon my heart. These words must be witheld until such a time as you and I are reunited, becoming as one, in faith, in humility, in complete passionate abandon. For love as intoxicating as this is a wine which must not be served before its time. It must be or it must not be. There is no in between. There is only anticipated silence, as one who waits for his savior to appear, standing on the edge of time.
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