2004-06-21 - twist edim age
I wanted to die
it was so overwhelming
one look in my eye
and I wanted to kill me
"one hell of a guy"
they would wink as they tell me
but it was a lie
and I think they would sell me
for some kind of high
or a chance to dispell me
.
all I had been now reduced to a wretch
even my friends didn't place any bets
now just a skull with its hair and its flesh
something constricting and choking my neck
keeping me sleepless like a nervous wreck
a painful, infected, malignant third eye
"a scorpion sting in the forehead," I'd cry
WHO KNOWS what was real and imagined those days?
while under the curse of the err of my ways
.
a lost in space passage
anxiety's last edge
a walk with some aspirins
a last minute heart change
.
I know what it's like to melt
I know how it burns your pelt
I can emphasize with pain
that starts inside the burned out brain
I know what it's like to complain
pending borderline insane
I know what it's like to wallow in the broken heart of ache and I know what it's like to swallow all the pills that it should take and I have made attempts to follow every path for goodness sake buddha swami prah-bu-pommi yippee yahoo yaqui fakes and I have had a curse upon me jealous girlfriends witches' brew something that put bindings on me all the stuff that I came through...
because of one who made me omni in a shared existence new and I know how this mighty army wants to train and recruit you
.
[tob econ tin ued]
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