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2004-06-21 - twist edim age I wanted to die it was so overwhelming one look in my eye and I wanted to kill me "one hell of a guy" they would wink as they tell me but it was a lie and I think they would sell me for some kind of high or a chance to dispell me . all I had been now reduced to a wretch even my friends didn't place any bets now just a skull with its hair and its flesh something constricting and choking my neck keeping me sleepless like a nervous wreck a painful, infected, malignant third eye "a scorpion sting in the forehead," I'd cry WHO KNOWS what was real and imagined those days? while under the curse of the err of my ways . a lost in space passage anxiety's last edge a walk with some aspirins a last minute heart change . I know what it's like to melt I know how it burns your pelt I can emphasize with pain that starts inside the burned out brain I know what it's like to complain pending borderline insane I know what it's like to wallow in the broken heart of ache and I know what it's like to swallow all the pills that it should take and I have made attempts to follow every path for goodness sake buddha swami prah-bu-pommi yippee yahoo yaqui fakes and I have had a curse upon me jealous girlfriends witches' brew something that put bindings on me all the stuff that I came through... because of one who made me omni in a shared existence new and I know how this mighty army wants to train and recruit you . [tob econ tin ued] � � |